Skip to main content

An Ode to my Best Friend (she influenced the whole post)



In the wise words of Taylor Swift: “the old Taylor can't come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, 'cause she's dead”.





Bit of a hard start there, but don’t worry it’s not (overtly) negative. The Saumyaa that started high school was just a bit of an overachieving obnoxious prat who could not stand not being the center of attention. Expert testimony (*cough* Ananya) can provide evidence that it was indeed quite difficult to actually like me.



But that has changed. Most probably. Conclusion is pending, evidence suggests improvement.


Anyway this is supposed to be a reflecting blog post, so why am I bringing up all my problems. Well it’s because all of these stemmed from a place of insecurity and the disproportionate importance I placed on my academic fulfillment. My high school experience can definitely be explained as me becoming more aware that life exists outside of all these expectations I had built up for myself. I was a control freak and needed everything to be exactly how it should be. So yeah Ananya don’t come and mess up my world by saying magic is real all of a sudden.

(A: “It is though”)





And with the years coming, that didn’t stop coming I got more relaxed. I let myself be calm little by little. I was now a true butterfly ready to take flight from the precious cocoon I had made. Of course this analogy is made ignoring the life span of 13 months because I don’t want to ‘die’ and start all over again. Freshman Saumyaa is the old Taylor, who is dead and who should remain dead.


AND THERE IT IS THAT’S WHY I WROTE THIS THING.


I have spent 4 years trying to come to terms with the fact that if I spend an hour talking to my friends about random things, my life will not implode, I will not fail all of my classes, drop out of high school and end up in a box below a bridge homeless, destitute and all around miserable. I don’t want to lose this progress ( it wasn’t much but it was honest work) so this blog post is to remind me that people will have to make a genuine 100% effort to actually like me if I revert back to freshman Saumyaa who couldn’t take a joke, and I don’t want to live in isolation. So take it easy.




But at the same time do keep studying it is important :)

Comments

  1. Ananya Menon3 May 2021 at 18:46

    "And with the years coming, that didn’t stop coming" fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. This blog was fantastic and it was really cool to see these years from your perspective. Good job bubs.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ananya Menon3 May 2021 at 18:46

    and yes...magic is real

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Poetry and why it's Relevant

Everyone I have spoken to (the five other people I talk to on a regular basis) about poetry and their thoughts about it, have in so many words expressed the same idea, poetry is overrated. This made me wonder how poetry is still relevant. From my (very biased, and skewed) sample it is obvious that people don’t really like poetry. Now from personal experience I can say that I thought of poetry as an unnecessary middle ground between stories and songs ( alliterations, they’re perfect). Cause like you get the whole narrative that you get in stories, but you have to add a rhyme scheme and rhythm to it, and then add hidden meanings. AND ALL THIS IS IN 5 STANZAS. Now I have changed a lot of my opinions this year, and poetry has been one of those. Poetry because of its position as a middle ground has the capability to express deep and complex meanings in a few words. It expresses emotions that a story might express in 1000 words, and with a smaller word range each word emphasizes the overall...
Post a Comment
Read more

I Put a Spell on You

Background Music  Magic tricks have always fascinated me. I know they are optical illusions, however, it’s always fun to enter a show and be prepared to figure out the magician’s secrets. Of course, I have always failed at that, and I’d have to be told (usually in a condescending tone) about the obvious trick. Despite my lack of comprehension with simple optical illusions, there is one illusion that I have figured out: freedom. Humans as a species love the idea of freedom, especially freedom in perceptions and ideologies. However, freedom like every magic trick is just an illusion; when looked at deep enough we come to the realization that outside factors are always influencing us. These factors do not just appear in our life, they are almost always sources of manipulation, set by people in authority. Most humans inherently look for someone to lead or guide them, the ones that don’t become the leaders and guiders. The leaders are charismatic beings who have an innate capability...
4 comments
Read more

Poetry 2

  So poetry right? It’s fun and interesting and everything until you have to sit down and analyze a poem about the Titanic which is apparently structured like the Titanic. Cheers to all the poets out there, cause that’s exactly what I needed in my life, more things to analyze.  (‘Life’ ‘analyze’ do those two rhyme? Sounds like it. Eh I digress) In my last post I tried to be all intellectual and find out why poetry is still so relevant in our society, and I came up with this theory that poetry works well because it’s the grey area between novels and songs, and so you get the best of both worlds. But still I mean it’s not necessary for a poet to ensnare and confuse me with twisted riddles when all they want to say is ‘pay attention to what you’re doing, people can trick you’. Like yeah Mr. Olive Senior I know that, but because of you I now have to write an essay on that. Like proper using words and coherent sentences.  (I wonder though, what would happen if I answered a poe...
Post a Comment
Read more